Authentic leadership is a concept that's been bouncing around in management and academic circles for about a decade. It's a concept that the Christian Leadership Alliance (CLA), had as the theme for their annual conference. CLA had workshops, special training sessions and a speaker's list that read like a Who's-Who of Christian leaders. I was blessed to attend the conference representing Christianity Today.

The CLA did an excellent job of building a series of presentations that allowed people to increase their ministry and leadership skills. However the following tangible, personal leadership lessons were things I learned, not in the seminars, but on the floor of the exhibit hall.

Lesson 1: The Christian faith is about perseverance.

Christ knew his goal and persevered through torture, abandonment, and death to win our salvation. We need to follow his example and continue to walk the path he has laid for us … until the end.

This faith-knowledge was reinforced when an elderly pastor came to the Christianity Today booth. With eyes as clear and sharp as any millennial, he told me how much he enjoyed our magazines. Before moving to the next booth, he told me, with pleasure, that he's been a subscriber to Christianity Today since he was at Fuller Theological Seminary, and his favorite professor left the seminary.

His professor was Carl F. H. Henry, who left Fuller 57 years ago to start Christianity Today magazine with Billy Graham. The lesson of persevering in the walk until the end must have made an impact on our well-past-retirement aged visitor. He confessed, with a smile, that he was currently "between ministries."

Lesson 2: Leadership begins with family.

As Christians, we are part of a wonderful extended family. I saw this throughout the three days at the CLA conference. Laughter, hugs, smiles, gentle ribbing, prayers, kindness, and concern—the kinds of things family members do to each other to show their affection—were evident throughout.

The first day of the conference, one of the leading team members at the booth next to us, Christian Community Credit Union, mentioned to me, in one of those self-introductions you make to complete strangers, that he'd lost his wife four years earlier. Though he had a positive personality, you could still see the loss in his eyes and the burden in his carriage. I wondered how much more radiant his smile was when she was alive.

That night on the phone, my wife and I discussed her doctor's visit earlier that day. Not everything was within normal parameters and being 1,700 miles away, with a vivid imagination and too much caffeine resulted in a restless night. My prayers before going to bed were for my wife, but the loss of my new conference neighbor stayed with me. I couldn't imagine losing my lifelong partner as he did.

Over the next few days, as I continued to talk with my neighbor, I realized that though his sadness is just under the surface, beneath it lives a bedrock of certainty that he will see her again.

Lesson 3: God is the ultimate leader.

Time after time we are reminded that though our egos want to deny it, we are not the leader of our own lives. We are blessed because the one who does lead loved us - to his death - and loves us still.

My friend Mark, a former colleague, and leader in a national ministry, had been trying to work out a time for the two of us to get together during the CLA. On the second day of the conference he mentioned that he was celebrating 10 years of being cancer-free. That day we agreed a celebration was in order. After the professional part of the day was complete, we walked over to a nice restaurant and celebrated. As the meal progressed and the conversation grew more personal, I was amazed at how God has used his talents, passion, commitment, and pain to make Mark into an exceptional tool to lead a team that builds relationships. Those relationships start with Mark's family and friends, but are extended by God professionally through his team to do his work.

That growth was only possible because Mark, who is exceptionally strong-minded and focused, allowed himself to be pliable and molded into a new creation. We all want to be used by God to do his will, but too often without pain. Mark will tell you that is impossible.

I am overwhelmed, time and time again, by the incredible family of believers we're a part of. My time at the Christian Leadership Alliance was no exception. Though there were workshops and sessions and helpful advice galore, God taught me the greatest lessons through simple fellowship with other believers. I couldn't be more thankful.

Phil Bandy is executive director of Advertising at Christianity Today.